Apr 26, 2009

night shout

A thousand feelings I felt this past week. Rollercoaster mood hangs me on everywhere. Too much mixed feelings between angry, mellow, pissed, and lonely I felt. Beda bgt sama minggu kemaren yg ironisnya lg uts tapi bener2 bisa ketawa lepas. Would love to take a break at some place that would calm me down the most. Make me laugh, smile, and feel thankfully. Need tri mas getir and their jokes. Need ussi and the rest of I class.

Kemaren dan kemaren dan kemarennya lagi, mood gw sm ussi bener2 like a rollercoaster. Bete, seneng, bete lagi sampe pusing sendiri. Udah tau suka bete2an gini tp kita masih tetep aja killing time BERDUA di kampus seharian. Gw mulai kelas stgh 3, tp uda di kampus dr jam 9. Ussi uda selese kelas dr jam 1, tp masih di kampus sampe jam 6 sore. Bener2 Ikatan Pecinta Kampus.
di kampus pagi2.
orang nyapa : "Hoy tal, kelas jam berapa?"
gw : "Jam setengah 3"
orang nyapa : "Ko uda dateng?"
gw : "Gapapa pengen aja."
orang nyapa : ...

di kampus udah sore.
orang nyapa : "Tal!"
gw : "Hoy!"
orang nyapa : "Lo kapan pulangnya sih? Bosen gw liat lo mulu."
gw : ...
Kamis siang bener2 bete merajalela. Kamis sore pas ank2 smua udah pulang tinggal gw sama ussi, kita duduk di pinggiran got parkiran, bengong bareng2, ngobrol dr hati ke hati *ketek ayam*, ngobrol dan ngobrol. Then, Kosa came. Obrolan makin berat bcoz he spoke in japanese and english and little2 indonesia. Kalah dah anak2 sastra inggris. And yk, I like the way he talk. He looks very smart and calm. Bener2 menenangkan hati. Next time mesti brainstorming sm dia. A must.

Anyways, ussi and I just watched Defiance on this friday. Not gonna tell you how good this film because I'm quite sure you already have watched it. I skipped its midnight when I was in Jkt. Jadi baru kesampean nonton skarang soalnya br muncul di matos.

Ada cerita. Soal uts h.o.e gw minggu lalu : Apakah feudalism ada hubungan dgn roman church's way of spreading christianity? I answered with a very long long answer and some logical arguments. Tapi ternyata jawabannya : Tidak ada. Abad pelaksanaannya aja udah beda. Dan 2 kelas yg diajar dosen ini jawabannya ga ada yg bener. Satupun. We made our own history. Oh f*ck myself. Stupid. Well, I admire the lecturer. He's an idealist with unique way of thinking. Kalo lo masuk kelasnya, pasti keluar2 lo bakal dapet ilmu dan cara pikir yg beda. Have a try..

UTS reading yg kmaren gw membego2kan diri sendiri ternyata I made a good score on it. And now, I'm optimistic about the rest UTS result.

Despite everythings I can complain, everything's running so well. I still can't keep far from the place, which called mall on weekend. I watched *finally* The Fast And The Furious. And the film was good. And the person whom I go with,,I just wonder if I could talk a bunch with you like once we did before on our very first time of spending time together.

Now : Too much dead air. No butterflies on my stomach at all. Ah, I don't know what this is. I don't miss it. I don't. I hope, I don't.

I'm at a point where I don't know what I'm doing, thinking, or feeling. Whatever, I guess I just felt a little annoyed when he pretend to not notice my existence on our trips. On the contrary, we missed each other, but when we met yg ada malah dead air, dead air, dan dead air. Apa dong namanya? Guilty pleasure? Ketemu, tenang, terus udah. But I admit it, I'm just feeling fine everytime I see him. Will I get over it someday? Can someday be tomorrow? What if it stays forever?
There's plenty of time left tonight, I promised I'd have you home before daylight
We do the best we can in a small town, act like big city kids when the sun goes down

There's so many things I have to say, I'll stay up all night to hear about your day
We do the best we can in a small town, act like kids in love when the sun goes down

Copeland - Coffee
The most recent state of mind : confused

Geez. Lagi pengen denger lagu2 mocca yg dr subud yg disimpen di fd mia yg dipinjem ussi *atau uda jadi hak milik?* tp ussi yg terkadang bodoh ini bisa2nya ngasih flashdisk berisi kosong.

nite.